It has been a rough couple of weeks – on all fronts.
Medically speaking, everyone in my immediate family is struggling, including myself. And although we are all doing the best we can, we are certainly having to rely on the Great Healer. He has proven that He CAN heal, but we are all waiting to see if He WILL. You see, something I learned a few days ago is that no matter what I am going through, I should count it as a blessing to share in His sufferings. He, in His divine wisdom, can, and will, use whatever I am going through to help others who are also suffering.
Emotionally speaking, I have a LOT of stress. It is okay, though, because I know the Lord is in control. I am choosing to draw near to Him in these tough times. It is not easy to walk this life sometimes, but I know He is sovereign and will bring me through to the other side.
And the REAL HUMBLING part of the last few weeks….
On more than one occasion I have been told my work is “not all that.” Do you realize how difficult that is to hear? Well, many of you do. And maybe I am just now understanding the whole “being humble” thing. Maybe I had to go through everything I have in order to bring me to this point. Wow – it has only taken me thirty years to get to this point! Man, am I stubborn!
I have been reevaluating my choices. Do I want to edit? Is it too difficult? Am I getting into the game too late? Is my writing THAT bad? Do I want to subject myself to bad reviews and brutally honest edits? Then I think about all of the successful people in this field and others. What made them successful? They kept going. They didn’t allow the negativity to squelch their pursuits. And the BIG thing……they remained humble. They used those difficult times to learn and grow – to better their craft.
“Lord, it is so difficult to be humble in this world. You know this. Please help me to focus on You and Your sovereign will. Allow me to strive to do my best for You. And if You bring folks into my life to show me where I am falling short, help me to graciously accept their words and seek to do better. Help me to keep my eyes focused on You so that my problems will be better seen through Your eyes. I love You, Lord.”