Originally posted July 18, 2014:
I am completely befuddled by a phenomenon that I believe is taking place in the Christian community. I am going to label it (because I love labels) “blinders for love.” Odd, you say? Let me explain.
Recently I have been reflecting on a situation that happened three years ago. I will waive going into too many details, but suffice it to say that I believe I have been done wrong. I am sure that that other parties involved feel as if I have done them wrong, but I don’t believe that to be the case. Nevertheless, this “wrong” I speak of has slowly seeped in and has caused others, I believe, to be wrong as well. But they put on “blinders for loving” because they refuse to either admit that they are allowing wrong to happen or not admitting that it is wrong to begin with.
Am I being a little vague? I’m sorry. Let me try and explain it another way. I believe that many times a person will see a friend who has been hurt and has fallen in to some kind of sin. Let’s say that sin is rebellion. If you are that person you now have a very tough choice to make. You can either confront the friend in love and show him the error of his/her way or you can ignore the sin because you value the friendship more. You don’t want to risk losing that friendship. If you choose the latter decision, you have put blinders on to the sin in order to save the friendship, for the sake of “love”. But is that a true agape love? Does the Lord care more about restoration to Him or appeasing a person’s conscience?
This is compounded and made even more complicated when the “friend” is actually a relative. We may justify our “blinders” by saying that God created family and that we should forgive and forget. All true! But what we fail to remember is that family comes SECOND to Christ. We do need to forgive, but we are NEVER to overlook sin. As parents we may fall into that trap when our child does something “foolish.” We wave it off as a childish behavior. However, we must never wave off sin. It must be dealt with, even if our child ends up not ‘liking’ us. Our children must be taught that obedience to the Lord is the most important characteristic for ANY believer.
Let me take this a step further…
When we as a family member see another family member sinning against a third family member, our role is to what? Be a friend because that family member may be hurting and alone? Skim over the blatant sin and try to reason it away? Try to find the good and forget the bad? What do any of these accomplish? Does it restore that family member to Christ? Does it restore the family member to the hurt one?
I wish to say to all of you dear brothers and sisters in Christ who are, in the name of love, putting blinders on to another fellow believer’s sin, You will be held accountable in the Lord’s eyes. You may think you are doing the right thing by not making waves, but at what cost? Please examine your hearts and see that no relationship is worth losing a soul over. Stop protecting the sinner and stand up for truth. Allow the Lord to be the one to keep relationships in the palm of His hand, restoring them as He deems fit, and you just be obedient.
I know I am on a little bit of a soap box, but today I found out a few things that I simply find horrendous. I discovered that some dear friends and even family members have been knowingly allowing my children to be disrespectful and downright un-Christian-like to me. I am hurt, yes, but I am more disappointed that these friends and family members value my children’s friendship more than they value truth. They refuse to call sin sin and put it in the forefront of those children’s minds. They are walking around with blinders for love.
I only pray that I will not be ashamed of the truth of God’s word and boldly proclaim in love that sin is sin and risk losing a friend or even family member.
Am I wrong in my way of thinking?